therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
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