If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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