Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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