Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
