I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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