I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.�
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
