Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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