Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Randomize
