I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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