I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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