Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
