can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
