Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
