the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
