He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
