im drinking this country out of the recession.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Randomize
