You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
