are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
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