This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
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