I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
