Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
