your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
