She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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