I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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