I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
