So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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