I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.�
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
