Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
Is it because I queefed?
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
