i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
