I need help removing her.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Randomize
