i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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