no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Randomize
