At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
zippers are such a cool invention
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
