you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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