you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
