At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
