No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
