Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
