Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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