"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
