I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
