Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Randomize
