A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
