hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
