Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
