I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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