ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
