i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Randomize