similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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