we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
